When a Girl Wants to Talk With You Again
By Sarah Fader |Updated
May 5, 2022
Text messages have increasingly become one of the most popular forms of communication. Like it or not, we all text each other in relationships, especially in this age of online dating.
Communication is very important in any relationship, especially at the early stages, and one of the ways through which we communicate is via texts since we cannot be together 24 hours a day, seven days a week. When you're dating someone, the tone of texting can be playful, sexual, a simple way of making plans, and more.
You need to be aware of how interesting your conversation is with your love interest and how to keep it going so that they want to continue talking to you. You can have a great time chatting with a girl over text while also trying to build something seriously out of it. However, some things are important that you bear in mind so that you do not get carried away and do the wrong things, which may overwhelm her, bring an untimely end to the friendship, or kill your chances.
Working on any relationship can be challenging, particularly if you're feeling pressure to impress someone you like. The professionals here at ReGain can help you navigate these feelings, concerns, and questions healthily and productively.
Aside from working one-on-one with a mental health professional, you might find it useful to be aware of what to avoid when texting a girl you're interested in if you'd like to keep the conversation going. Let's take a closer look.
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Improper Grammar Is A No-No
Even if you are communicating electronically, it's essential to be aware of the written word.
When you text using improper grammar or misspell things, it may make your messages look like they're rushed or not put together. It could, over time, communicate that you're not making an effort to elaborate on how you think, what you feel, or that you don't care to make a good impression on them.
Overall, your messages must convey the same level of emotion, interest, and curiosity that you'd express in person. Thoughtful messages can show your love interest that you're invested in sharing your thoughts and feelings, which can go a long way.
That doesn't mean that you need to write emotional novels when you're texting a girl interested, but it can help keep your grammar on point. There's nothing wrong with errors, slang, or emoticons, but be sure to try to strike a balance between genuine conversation and these types of informal communication.
Emojis
Emojis depict your feelings and can be useful in expressing your emotions. However, you need to be careful in your use of emojis. When you text a girl, you can add an emoji or two to spice it up. Emojis should only be used creatively and necessary at the beginning of building rapport with a girl.
Pick and choose your emojis carefully. There are instances where you can overuse emojis in place of words. Some people love emojis and use them all of the time, whereas others aren't a fan. They can be a lovely accent to the conversation, but relying on them exclusively to communicate how you're feeling isn't advisable, especially when it comes to online dating. For example, if you're flirting via text, you might use a winky face, and it can add something to that banter.
On the other hand, you don't want to use them in a way that is overkill or in a way that is meant to replace language. If she receives a text with only a winky face or just an animal, for example, it might limit the conversation and cause things to die down because there's not much that she can say in response to that. Again, you want to show that you're making an effort to come across as well-read and thoughtful. Think of emojis as an accent to what you're saying rather than the centerpiece of the message.
Follow Her Texting Cues
Remember that people can only internalize so much information at one time. Keep that in mind when you're talking to the girl interested. You don't want to look like you're too invested early on; it can read as obsessive. Give her space to respond to what you're saying. If you inundate her with giant blocks of texts without giving her a chance to reply, it's going to make it difficult for her to respond in a way that makes sense or address everything that you're saying. Keep it short and straightforward, and if you're wondering how often to text a girl interested or how much to say to her, use this simple rule; mirror how much she's texting you.
For example, if she texts you one paragraph, send one paragraph. If she texts you a sentence, text her a sentence. If you go at her speed, you'll avoid overwhelming or underwhelming her. Make sure that there's no imbalance in the exchange because if she becomes overwhelmed or under-engaged, the conversation is unlikely to prosper and continue in the way that you'd like it to.
By this same rule of thumb, you'll be able to tell if she's interested or if she isn't interested. If she's interested, she'll probably be mirroring the length and content density if and when she does respond to your text. With this little litmus test in mind, it's easy to understand if the girl interested is or isn't interested in keeping the conversation going. If you keep receiving short answers to questions requiring longer answers, this may signify that she is not interested in the conversation.
Less Is More, But Too Little Is Not Enough
A simple "how's your day going?" text goes a long way. You're showing her that you care about her wellbeing. You want to know what's happening in her world. You can text her, "I was thinking about you." Depending on how romantic you want to be, there are ways to flirt via text, even when you're just checking in. Try to avoid monosyllabic responses when she gets back to you. If you text "okay," or "yes," you may come across as cold. There's a balance when it comes to texting. Depending on your response, they will reply and mirror your enthusiasm. If you appear disengaged from the conversation, the girl interested will be less likely to reply and keep up the banter.
Timing In Text Is Important
When she texts you, don't respond right away. Give it a moment to think about what you're going to say back to her. There are times when you have a gut reaction to a message, especially when it comes to online dating, and you think of a witty reply. If that's the case, respond immediately. Sometimes, a quick response is appreciated. You want to be careful not to look too eager but also not to appear too detached. You have a life, and you want to include the girl interested in it. Make her feel like you're allowing time for her and prioritize the things that are important to you. The reality is that we can't focus on one person all of the time. Texting with someone you care about is an enjoyable part of life but shouldn't monopolize your time. Trust your intuition, and if something in the conversation seems off, take a break. You don't need to respond instantly; you can take some time to craft a reply that makes sense and expresses your feelings accurately. Making your feelings known is very important. Movies might show characters who are detached emotionally, but in real life, it is important to make your true feelings known.
How Do You Talk To Your Friends In Person?
Texting isn't all that different than talking to someone in person in many ways. Remember how you speak to your friends in person and communicate naturally. You don't have to draw up a Shakespearean play when you're texting the girl of your dreams. Instead, text her in a way that feels organic to you. Be yourself and keep things light and simple. One of the most important things is that you show genuine interest in what she's saying. For example, if she shares with you that she's a Sociology major, you can say, "Oh, cool! Tell me more about that. What are your classes like?" Ask her how her day was, or tell her about something interesting that happened to you today. You can talk to her as you'd speak to one of your friends. Trying to be someone you're not is extremely clear via text; you'll look like you're trying too hard. You want her to like her for you, so be authentic. When they text girls, some guys tend to go overboard, especially some people who have an abundance mentality. Bear it in mind that authenticity is very important, as putting up a show for her at the inception of the friendship or getting to know her may not be good in the long run when it gets to the point when you can no longer continue your act.
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Flirting Via Text Message
Texting can be a great way to engage in flirtatious banter, or if you're involved in online dating, it might be one of the primary ways you speak to someone before meeting up in person. In online dating, it can also be something that makes someone want to see you. You can entice people via text. You can keep messages light and also allude to what you'll be doing in person when you see your girl interested. It could be a preview of something that you're doing romantically, like holding hands or going on a date, or, if applicable to your relationship, you could allude to something that you might be doing in the bedroom when you see each other. Keeping it light and flirtatious can be a great way to make someone feel at ease with you and set expectations for what you'll do together in person. If you choose to hint at something sexual via text, use the mirroring rule again; only do this if she feels comfortable talking about physical intimacy via text, and don't push it if she isn't.
Setting Up Dates
Texting can be a low-maintenance way to suggest going on a date. You can say something like, "Hey, I'd love to take a walk in the park with you. Are you free to do that on Friday afternoon?" When you text her, keep things light, and if you ask her out or ask her to hang out with you, be sure to state a specific time and location. Not only does this make it easy for her to respond, but it also shows that you're considerate of her time and that you're putting in the effort to make plans, which is very attractive. Sometimes, the pressure to keep a conversation going occurs first because the other person isn't sure how to respond to what you said. There are ways to avoid that, and one of them is to ask clear open-ended questions.
Open-Ended Questions
One way to make a conversation stop is to ask questions that can only be answered with a yes or no answer. You can use sarcasm and be funny, but don't rely on that for the whole conversation, either. Ask her questions like, "How are you doing?" and "How is your day going?" Again, remember to avoid multi-texting. Multi-texting is the term for what we discussed earlier concerning sending multiple large blocks of text in a row without a response from the other person. It's okay to give someone time to reply, and she doesn't have to reply right away. It's okay to wait to see if someone responds, and nothing terrible will happen if she doesn't respond.
She Doesn't Hate You
When the girl interested that you're interested in doesn't text you back, it could leave you wondering why. Rest assured that she doesn't hate you. There can be various reasons for not texting someone back, like being busy, not knowing what to say, or being socially anxious. Remember, even if you're following all of the rules for texting girls, she might not be responsive immediately. That a girl doesn't reply immediately is not a reason to think that she's not interested in you, the best bet is to hold on for a while before texting her again.
With the various reasons that could be possible, do not assume that you know the reason. Some people are always on their phones, while others can be away from their phones for hours or days due to work, family, or digital detox. The reason could also be because she's not a texter! Some people prefer to call or have conversations in person as opposed to messaging back and forth. If you suspect the girl interested isn't a texter, try calling her instead. Of course, you might want to send a text first asking if it's a good time to call to show her you're respectful of her time and preferences.
Know When Not To Text
Although texting is an excellent medium to communicate with a love interest, it's not always an ideal conversation mode. Certain conversations are better had in person or over the phone. If something is an emotional matter, and you see that the text conversation is going in that direction, it's smart to stop it right there and say, "I would like to discuss this in person when you have time."
Even if you're following all of the rules for texting girls perfectly, some conversations can't or shouldn't happen via text message! This is important because having an emotional text conversation can get confusing. You can't hear a person's tone via text, nor do you necessarily know what's going on around them when you're speaking to them via text, which can lead to things getting more heated than they need to. Messages can be misconstrued, so talk to your partner in person about serious or emotional topics.
Online Counseling And Dating
Online counseling is an excellent place to discuss issues surrounding dating and romance. The counselors at ReGain want to help you communicate with your love interest or partner effectively. If you find that you're having trouble communicating or getting across what you want to say, that is something that you can work on in therapy. Perhaps, you and your partner experience differences in communication regularly and want to go to couples counseling to work things out. Search the network of counselors at ReGain and find the best fit for you.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Should I text her or wait?
If she texted you, you don't have to wait to text her back. You can respond to her whenever you have time and can do so. If she hasn't texted you back, however, it's best to wait to reach out again so that she'll have the chance to respond to your initial text message. Wait until the next day to text back, and restart the conversation with a sweet and funny GIF, a clever meme you think she'll like, or by saying, "Hey! How are you?" Texting girls doesn't have to be complicated or something that carries a lot of pressure, and texts don't have to take a lot of time to craft to be charming or eye-catching. A good text to send when you just started texting a girl interested or want to talk but aren't sure what to say is something casual and funny; a cute animal meme will do the trick, and it's likely to brighten her day, too!
There is no universal rule on whether to wait for her to text or you be the one to text first. It is not rude to text a girl first, especially in that early phase after you just got her number. Promptness can be considered a sign of seriousness, so if you stall on reaching out, she may think you properly don't like her or you changed your mind about her, and that is why you didn't text.
Should I text a girl every day?
It's normal for people to text each other daily in many connections, whether that connection is romantic or just a close friendship. When you're texting girls, don't feel obligated to start texting daily. If it happens and you're both into the conversation, that's great! That said, a busy day here and there where you don't talk as much is totally fine. The best texting advice to use while texting a girl interested is following her lead and leaving the ball in her court. That way, you won't ever look desperate, but you also will not look disengaged. This is great texting advice, too, because it will show that you have respect for her schedule and obligations. You're not pushing her, and she's not pushing you, but you both reply when you can. This could very well be the start of a healthy communication pattern and even a romantic relationship. Also, note that everyone loves and looks forward to having great, interesting, and enlightening conversations. So when you want to text a girl, make sure that your focus is meaningful and fun-filled conversations.
How often should you text a girl to keep her interested?
There's no set number of texts a day you should send a girl interested in keeping her interested. Every connection is unique, and so are both of you. Some people text a lot, especially someone who has an abundance mentality, whereas others prefer FaceTime or talk on the phone. When texting women, the best thing to do is keep both of your schedules in mind and text each other when it feels right. If you feel like it's time, it's the time! However, with the timing in mind, the text ratio should be even, which is why texting girls is the easiest and most effective when you follow her lead after establishing an initial conversation. You want to show her you're interested without being overbearing. It can easily be perceived as overbearing if you're texting a girl interested significantly more than she is texting you. However, if you're waiting for a girl interested in texting you, but she's not texting back at all, you can send a quick follow-up.
How do you keep a girl interested while texting?
Text with a purpose. Don't say "hey" multiple times if she doesn't reply, and refrain from simply saying "hey" without a follow-up statement or question in general. If you say "hey" alone, it isn't stimulating and doesn't give her much to respond to. This is one of the biggest mistakes guys make when texting girls. She isn't interested in idle chit-chat; she wants to get to know you better, and she wants you to ask her questions to show that you care about getting to know her. "Thinking of you" is a great text to send, and it certainly has a time and place, but if you're texting a girl interested and want to keep her interested in the conversation, ask a question, even if it's just, "What did you do today?"
How do you make a girl miss you badly?
Although it's not always possible to make someone miss you or to make someone feel anything, for that matter, there are some things that you can do to create the potential for her to miss you and for her heart to grow fonder. First, when you do talk, make sure that the conversation is engaging. Stay away from idle chit-chat or simply saying "hey" with nothing else in the message. Even though there seem to be a million rules for texting girls, many guys are surprised that texting girls in an engaging way are easier than it sounds. Mostly, all you have to do is ask questions, listen to her answers, show interest in what she tells you, and throw in something that you think she'll like here and there. For example, you might hear a song, see a video, or see a meme that makes you think of her or that you think she will enjoy. Seeing this part of your personality will make her miss you when you aren't around. Second, while you don't need to play hard to get, you also don't need to rush to reply when you are busy. Respond when it feels right, but don't text too many times in a row if she hasn't replied at all to you.
Deliberately making a girl miss you badly may not be a very good idea, and if not done with care, it can end a good relationship before it even starts. It is understandable if you cannot text her every day, especially considering your schedule. Initiating texts and getting it to the point where the girl looks forward to your message and then holding back or withdrawing it is not a way to make her miss you.
What does it mean if a girl never texts you first but responds?
She reached out to you. That's a good sign to see when texting a girl interested. If a girl interested texts you but doesn't reply to your responding text, the chances are that she got busy. A lot of people lack free time, and sometimes, their social life suffers as a result. So, if a girl interested seems responsive to you when you text her, don't wait for the girl interested to text you first!
What you can do is send her an entertaining, sweet, or funny text, photo, or piece of media to restart the dialogue. This is a great idea when texting girls because it's something that pretty much anyone will appreciate, and it does show that you have an easy-going, understanding, confident, and fun nature. Keeping this chill approach is one of the top rules for texting girls. You can also wait a few days and text a girl interested in asking how she's doing if she texts you and doesn't respond to your text.
Don't take it personally if she doesn't text you every day. The fact that she didn't text you during the day could be that her schedule is tight, and she is busy. Also, do not always expect prompt replies, especially since your schedules may never always be the same. Respect her silence so that you would not appear to be a nuisance.
When should you stop texting a girl?
If she asks you to stop texting her, definitely stop. Don't text her again if she explicitly asks you to stop. Additionally, if you reach out several times and she never replies, it's safe to say that you shouldn't keep texting her, particularly if this is a girl you just met. If she does stop texting you entirely and ignores multiple attempts to reach out, this time, it's ready to put the phone down and start chatting with other people. Never say, "Fine, I guess I won't text you" or, "Since you're not texting me, I'll ignore you, too," and don't text if you're currently processing anger about someone's lack of response. This is the single biggest mistake guys make when texting women. If she was going to get back to you at some point, she's not going to now, and if she wasn't, it's an act far more distasteful than a lack of response. Texting girls with a statement like this is a huge turn-off, and it can even come off as threatening or scary.
Additionally, make sure that you don't text multiple times asking why she didn't get back to you if she doesn't reply or takes some time to do so. When you text a girl after she has asked you to stop, this sends the message that you have no regard for her opinion and no respect for her privacy. And this is a major red flag in a future relationship. Respect her wishes and honorably back off. You don't want to appear rude or have a disagreement with the girl over text messages.
There's no single set of rules for texting girls, so it's understandable to wonder why she's not texting back. Many guys and girls face this issue, and most people have been on both the giving and receiving end. Some people, again, don't text people often or prefer to interact in person. Other people get caught up with life or put their phones down when they are with other people. It could even be a case of social anxiety or depression. When texting girls, know that if a particular girl interested isn't interested, you need to respect that and that if she doesn't text back, it's probably not as personal as you think it is. Don't try to change her mind. An attempt to change her mind will likely backfire, so take it gracefully. Put things into perspective; if she isn't replying, it's unlikely that she is the one anyway.
How much texting is too much to a girl?
When texting a girl interested, the number of text messages you send to each other should be relatively equal. Try to scale back a little bit if you're texting a girl interested much more than she's texting you. For example, if you send her thirteen texts in a day and she sends you two, she tries to scale back until you match the amount she texts you a little more. Again, there are no set rules for texting girls; some people are more talkative than others. She might not be much of a texter. Maybe, she prefers real-life interactions, and her texting style is quick, simple, and sweet. Particularly if she actively shows that she's interested in you in person, but when you start texting a girl interested, she doesn't reply quickly or often; that's probably what's going on.
How do you keep a girl interested in you?
The best way to keep someone interested in a conversation is to ask questions, show interest in what the woman texting says, and let your personality shine through. When you're having a conversation with a girl interested, know how to keep it going. At the same time, don't base your entire love life on a text message conversation. Instead, ask her questions, whether they're random questions about her interests or follow-up questions about something she told you in the past. If this is a girl interested you just met, make an effort to get to know her. Use an ice breaker like a game of two truths and a lie, or ask questions about her life and make an effort to preserve what she tells you. A good night text or a good morning text is always a good idea when texting a girl interested if you want to keep her interested. This is a great time to text someone because texting a girl interested good night or good morning is an excellent way to make her feel cared for. It's a sweet gesture, and it's easy, too. Remember, though, these text messages are just a conduit to an in-person relationship.
How often should I text her without seeming desperate?
Texting, just like any form of communication, depends on the flow and intensity of the conversation. You have to adhere to some important texting rules so that you don't appear to be desperate. Communication thrives on response. Giving unequivocal responses is very important when texting since the tone of the conversations can't be gotten. Ambiguous responses can lead to misconceptions as well as misunderstandings.
The key to how to keep a girl interested while you're texting her is to let the conversation happen naturally. When there's a new girl interested in you or that you're interested in, it's easy to get carried away. Here's some dating advice: you might want to text her or chat with her all the time. When you're talking and texting with a girl, she'll help carry the conversation and keep it going if the girl interested likes you.
When it comes to keeping a girl interested in online dating, things can get a bit more complicated. For example, you don't know who else the girl interested is talking to on the online dating platform, so that you might feel a bit competitive. However, if you text the girl interested more than she wants you to, it can be a huge turn-off for her. Here's some more dating advice: while there's no texting guide for how to keep a girl interested, there are a few key rules. First of all, if she's not replying, you should stop constantly texting her.
To avoid appearing desperate, let your conversation be hinged on her response time- if she replies in a few seconds, reply at the same frequency. This creates a flow that enhances communication. Try not to put her under pressure in any way. Also, try not to leave her messages unread or unresponded to for long, which may discourage her. Understandably, things might come up in the course of your day which may take you away from your phone, but you can notify her that you want to take a break or you need some time to attend to something before going off.
Another tip to help you not to appear desperate is to make sure she signs off every day's text- i.e., she sends the last message, so that in case she doesn't text the following day, you can initiate the text. You have to be very wise at this point; her replies will give you insight into knowing whether she wants to continue the conversation or not.
Should you text her every day?
The rule of thumb, especially if you're texting a lot with her, is to text her when it feels natural and reciprocated. If a girl interested in you doesn't reply to your text, don't force conversations. In general, girls don't like guys texting every day if the girl interested doesn't ever respond: it's annoying and makes the guy seem desperate. If you want to keep a girl interested, you don't need any fancy dating tips. Just focus on what the girl likes and how the girl feels. Texting her every day is dependent on quite a several factors. For a girl you just started talking to, texting all day might not pass the right message across. Most girls at the inception of a relationship want to assess their potential man, and texting all day may put her off. However, someone who has an abundance mentality may not mind.
If you're looking for how to keep a girl interested, be sure to keep things natural. Don't try too hard; when you're talking, reference the things you have in common. Here's some dating advice: if you see something interesting or funny that you think she'll appreciate, use it as a way to talk to a girl interested. However, please don't force it. Instead of viewing the conversation as a means to "win" a girl interested in you, think of it as a way to talk to a girl interested in getting to know her better. Hopefully, as you get to know her and she gets to know you, she'll stay interested, and she won't lose interest. If you're texting her every day and she's replying every day, then you're already well on your way to date texting and possibly may start dating!
When you're dating, having time for her or spending quality time with her will be regarded as a sweet gesture. Texting her every day shows the degree of your love and shows that you have her in mind. In such a case, seeing her texts every day should be the norm. When you text her every day, it sends an emotional message to someone you are dating, making her feel special. This is not a universal rule, though, as some people may prefer calls to texts. The bottom line is to know what the other person likes.
Online dating, "dating," and other relationships based on text conversations can be exhausting for many women, especially if a guy can't take a hint. Sometimes, when a guy is talking to a girl interested in text, he can be pushy or aggressive. This can lead the women online to refuse to reply or even block that guy. So, if you want to know how to keep a girl interested when you're dating online or communicating primarily via text, the key is moderation and natural flow!
This means that texting every day is not necessarily the best dating practice. Even if you're online dating and your entire relationship exists only online, it's possible that the girl you're talking to doesn't like communicating via text. Some girls don't love texting; in this case, you should pick up the phone and call her. Or, keep your texts to a minimum and start by only texting her to set up a date when you can meet up and spend some quality time together.
Remember, when it comes to keeping a girl interested, quality is more important than quantity! Just because you don't text her every day, or even if she doesn't reply every day, it doesn't mean that she's not interested in you. Just because you love texting doesn't mean that she does. And just because the conversation isn't happening every day doesn't mean that it isn't a great conversation!
How often should I text my crush?
When it comes to how often you should text your crush and how to keep a girl interested, it's important first to consider the nature and depth of your existing relationship. Is she a close friend that you spend time within "real life"? Is she someone you met on an online dating app, and you haven't yet met in person? All of these elements will play a role in how frequently you'll be texting your crush. So, if you're wondering, "how often should I text my crush?" you need to consider those factors carefully. The key is to keep the pace, the topics, and the conversation as a whole nice and natural. Please don't force it. Let the friendship grow naturally. And try not to overdo it, so you are not seen as a pest. If you don't have anything to say, don't send a message. Instead, go for quality instead of quantity. Carefully study the person you are dealing with; her personality trait and other factors are important. While some people may not mind occasional checking up from a new friend, some may want to take their time before opening up to proximity or close friendship.
When you have succeeded in making your crush feel comfortable with and around you, i.e., you have built your friendship to a certain level of trust; then, you can text her every day. Conversations at this point keep coming and flowing naturally. Texting her every day won't be a chore, especially since there is an existing connection between you.
How long should I wait to text her?
There is no fast rule as to how long you should wait before texting her. After getting her number, you can text her within a few hours after your meeting/conversation while the attention is still fresh. If she gave you her number herself, she most likely has a mental note of you and may even be looking forward to getting a text or call from you, especially if she likes your person or if you impressed her during your meeting or conversation. So since she gave you her number, that means she is open to communication so that you can send her a text probably within the next few hours. It doesn't have to be a long text; you may tell her a 'thank you for giving you her number, or to tell her it was a pleasure meeting her. When you text your crush promptly, it shows that you are conscious of her and also helps to keep your memory fresh in her mind. However, the fact that you now have her number does not in any way mean you should bombard her with texts so you do not come off as a pest.
By the time you start dating, texting her can then become more constant. But at the start point, you must pay attention to her disposition towards you and your texts, with attention paid to how she replies. From the texts exchanged, you will ascertain how she chats or replies to messages and even know the appropriate tone and tempo to use moving forwards.
For someone you are dating, texting her every day is very necessary and helps enhance your and strengthen your bond. Of course, this should go alongside calling her and talking to her on the phone. However, it is important to factor in her schedule, especially if she is busy and may not have the luxury of time to do many phone talks or frequent texts. You do not want to be a distraction, so you shouldn't text or call continuously when you know she may be busy. If you send a message and she doesn't text or call back immediately, she is probably busy and will get back to you when she is free.
What does it mean when you text a girl every day?
When you send texts to a girl every day, it can be for a whole lot of reasons. In this case, when you text her every day, the propensity of being interested in her is very high, particularly if you are not typically used to texting girls.
When you find yourself wanting to reach out and text your crush, you are most likely getting emotionally attached, and of course, this isn't bad. If she likes you enough to reciprocate the gesture, this may be a good pointer to the fact that a beautiful friendship is budding, and if this is groomed, it can lead to something promising.
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